Thoughts of an Introvert

I always got the "Ughh!" reaction towards most things that I am into. I found it's intricate for them to be please by it. I found myself letting them down at times. Most of the time, I found them being hypercritical. Hypercritical is just a sophisticated way to represent the word 'judgemental'. I would not care if people feel like to bash my attitudes but reviling my passions and interests, it's just so wrong to me! Our passions and interests are all varies. Eventhough we are bestfriends or siblings, our passions mostly differs from one person to another. Still don't get about what I say? Okay, let's say I love tattoo arts but you, on the other hand, hates tattoo. You disgust by it. I don't care if you are loathe by it, there's no need for you to go around and say "OH! I HATE TATTOOS. PEOPLE WITH IT LOOKS SHITTY. THEY'RE SLUTS." Let me tell you what; If you love country songs and I hate it, I don't go around and bashin...

It's 12:30AM sharp. I can't sleep. I don't know why. So I decided that I wanna write a blog with no specific topics. No one tells me that the side effect of getting attached with someone doesn't feel as good as get in one. Once you're attached, there's no turning back. You either painfully stay or painfully letting go. Well, nothing is easy in this world right? Haha okay. Whatever. Trying not to get attach to someone but it has been your habit, it's hard. You tryna not to ruin shits. Shits were ruined and it was fucked to face. Well, not again! You need to change that attitude. For the sake of happiness. I didn't say it's wrong but it's exhausting. It does. Changing is a fulltime job. Sigh~ I feel fucked. Fucking lonely. Do you ever meet someone who is so nice and sweet with you? You and him hangout together like it was a perfect day.  They were so kind and all. You started to feel like you been treated like how a lady sup...

"What if I never love again?" That is one line from Adele's song that turned on my thinking mode. It made me ask myself that question: What if I never love again? Is that possible? For me to never love again. Is it impossible? I wish I knew the answer by now. I even wish I knew every answer to everything that I wanna know by now but it doesn't work that way. You know, being broken and hurt is not an ideal situation. Everyone is avoiding to be in one. Letting go is not an overnight work. You need to let go and let go and let go until one morning you see it dissapear. Healing something that you can't see the scars is hard. You need to keep bandage on until the scars finally gone. It's a job. Fulltime job. There will be times where you will beg for a rest from fixing your broken parts. Well, good news! You can stop for few times and it will still be okay. Don't push yourself too hard on this. Give yourself a little respect and love, then everything wi...

I don't know how to go on with this title that Nathan gave me but I'll just write what is on my mind. Love yourself. Truth to be told, to me, loving myself is the hardest thing to do. It's a shit hard thing to execute in life other than trying to be genuinely happy. I mean, we live in a community where people ask us to love ourself but then when we tryna be ourself, they tell us it's not the right way as how to be one. How in this whole wide world can you be yourself when others restrict you? Long story short; don't give a single fuck about what others think and say about you true self. You know yourself better. You know what you are capable of. You know how your mind, body and soul work on this planet earth. If you keep trying to please other people, you will somehow find yourself pushing yourself away. You might not know what you truly want in life because you been living others people life. Is it okay for you to lose your true self? Well, it's ...

Ever get so close with someone for some period of time? Seems like all goes well. Seems like both of you can get through it all. Seems like it will last forever and for always. It seems so perfect. No arguments ever been brought up. Everything is so well. But then something prove you wrong. Something that is inevitable. It is out of your control to even be steer towards happy ever after. It crashes. Nothing can save it. Not even if you cry your blood tears out, it won't save the connection shared. Ever been through that? No? Then consider yourself lucky and pray to God that He won't put you through it cus the side effect doesn't feel much better. If yes, then congratulations to you that you survived. You survived from grieving over someone who is still alive. In those stages of grieving, every stages are full of suffering. Crying is not an alien to you. Depression is not your new friend. Loneliness is not a stranger to be welcome. When you drift ...

Love came knocking on my door, I let it in with no hesitation, Though I feel the harm, I ain't care of its danger, I still let you in. It introduces itself to me, Exposing itself like it'll last long, Sure I love it, Feel like I've been given a trust, Deep down I know I was just a fool. I didn't know how to react, To all of those, It escalated quickly, I got no time to run. I fall. So hard. Nothing is on the ground to catch me, Free fall, Hoping for a miracle to happen. It did catch me, But just for a while, It was a temporary fix. Ironically, That temporary fix, Changed my whole view, In seeing everything Now that it's gone, I left with nothing else but myself. Myself is enough, I was alone once, What is my excuses of can't alone now? Self-love is crucial to me. How about you? Love, Ophelia ♡

The person who once matter to you won't be anymore right by now. The one who you thought is the one for you, is not anymore now. The one who you thought is the best for you, is not anymore right by now. Whether it's your friends or your significant other; anyone that is in your life. No matter who you are, you must have been through this once in your lifetime. It hurts, doesn't it? Seeing that person shifting from being the most adorable human being you have ever known into someone who act like they never know you when you bump into them. Do all of the memories made didn't mean a thing to them? Aren't they affected by the heartaches when they pass by the places you've went together? Do they even have a heart? Cus you feel everything. You feel everything when things changed. Sad. Devastated. Ftustrated. Confused. You name it! You feel all of it! Sometimes you question your own self. "Why can't I be heartless as they are if they are truly heartl...